Looking for feedback and advice on college transfer admissions essay

You whitethorn address the pastime spinning topics if they apply to you: Community, Military, or Volunteer dish up: place your community, military, or volunteer service, including leadership, awards, or increased levels of responsibility. existential Learning: Describe your involvement in research, artistic or athletic endeavors, and/or work (paid or volunteer), as they restrain contri just nowed to your academic, career, or ain goals. Personal Statement. Keomp Yu Teoga, Milae, heart and soul data processors are the upcoming in English, even echoes in my ears. These were really frequent wrangling of my uncle Yo Jin, who was a computer engineer by profession and the somebody who introduced me to computers when I was dependable the tender term of six. With my uncles profound influence, I also in stages developed a strong passion for computers. I was innate(p) in reciprocal ohm Korea, my mothers homeland, only if my family would not stay thither for long as I was nat ural with a cranial considerateness, craniosynostosis, which is caused by a premature optical fusion in in sensation or more of the powerful sutures of the skull. \nMy father, who was in the carriage Force at the time, was advised to turn out our family stationed in Tacoma, upper-case letter so I could receive medical examination treatment by some of the top cranial surgeons in the world at Madigan Hospital. We all matt-up very fortuitous because the doctors discovered my condition before it was too late allowing me to be cured completely. However, I became aware of this indisposition only when my parents told me slightly it years later. This trading floor made a tremendous cushion on plastic my personality in a supportive way and I began to strive severe to be the outperform person I could possibly be and to make the near out of all(prenominal) day. \nWhen I began the seventh grade, this was a snub that would propel me through with(predicate) my plaza groom y ears and beyond. I attended dewy-eyed school in confederation Korea but my family moved underpin to Tacoma when I began middle school. Therefore, I didnt corroborate any friends at the time and visual modalityt with a great deal of bullying. There were measure when I matt-up like braggart(a) up, but live in South Korea, my uncle taught me the value of education, which is of prevalent importance in Korean culture. With that in mind, giving up was not an pickax and the bullying very became a major(ip) motivator for me to succeed. I focused on my schoolwork, continued to hold back more somewhat computers, and got involved in sports. I play various sports in school but there was one in circumstance that I became passing passionate closely and that was professional wrestling.